Thank You For Caring
(April 03, 2004 - 1:25 P.M.)

It was just so beautiful, the way the sharp piercing of the safety pen as it barely skimmed my already reddened flesh. In a daze. I felt no pain.

Until the next hour did I bleed. 'Why?' I asked myself, caressing the faint blood lines of my traced vains. 'Why, oh, why wasn't I thinking?'

I put on my headphones and listened to the blaring music to swarm into my ears as I looked around. Nobody saw me do this. Nobody would know unless it may strike their attention.

Stinging engulfs my hand as I bite my bottom lip. If noone sees then noone knows. I ran to the bathroom and wrapped my hand in a soaked paper towel until the blood would scab over and become less noticable.

I should not take this medication if it makes me want to do this to myself. I need to take more caution. I fall asleep until I am awoken and dismissed from my assigned life. I am given my old life back. Even with my old life given to me, my wrists still burn. The blood has scabbed over yet it burns angrily.

The letters T-A-K-E are engraved into my knuckles.

No guilt. Just drained.

Guilt comes when a friend notices and asks. I tell him. I tell him how I did it. A concerned eye pierces my heart.

'Why?' I want to crawl into a hole somewhere and die. 'Why did I do this?' The concerned eye lifts and turns into care.

Someone cares about me I am careless as not to know this.

Thanks for caring, Blake.

~Lindsey